The funny thing about forgiveness.

So yesterday was Valentines Day, I sent a massive txt to all my friends and I immediately get one back. It's Ashton, "Yeah, Eff Valentines Day, we should have a Kat and Ashton day!" I sent him one back and said "We should!". We have plans for sometime next week, I went on with my day at rehearsal and while on stage it hit me. Wait a minute, shouldn't I dislike him? I did, for a really long time, but I forgave him. But why? He thoroughly messed up my life, I'm still trying to recover from being what I call "gun shy". Because of him I tend to have a "I'm going to F* this up at some point so I might as well jump ship now" attitude. But is that really his fault? Or is it mine? I began to think, maybe I'm weak. I'm a weak person, even after the hell I went through I still let him back into my life. Granted, I keep him at arms distance, and I only see him maybe once every two months, still I call him a friend again. Really Katelyn? Really? 

But then I came to this realization. 

  Yeah, I'm weak, I'm a forgiver, a lover. Whatever you want to call it, that's what I am. So what? I would rather let people hurt me then spend my life afraid of everybody. Now, for me that is WAY easier said then done. It may take like 5-10 years but I promise to work on it, or not, we'll see ;-)